Tuesday, December 27, 2011

Serious Health Warning: MALE PATTERN BLINDNESS! (Redux)

Today my husband came upstairs to ask me to help him look for his wallet because he'd "looked everywhere" and couldn't find it. When I came downstairs, it was sitting right on the counter. In plain sight. Right. On. The. Counter.


It made me think of a blog post I'd done a couple of years ago, so in honor of my husband's morning gaffe, I decided to re-post this serious health warning to all you women out there:

(Originally posted Sept. 20, 2009)

So something’s been happening around my house lately. Or rather, to my son.

I mean, I knew he was a boy. The doctor told me so on the day he was born. And I was thrilled. Ecstatic. A boy! My boy. And, boy, how this boy would be different. A sensitive, sweet boy. The kind who would listen to what women had to say, who would talk…actually *talk* when asked questions, engaging in, get this, conversation. He wouldn’t respond to questions with just one-word answers or, worse, grunts.

And he was. For years, my little angel told me precious things, like that he wanted to marry me and live with me forever. Okay, maybe not for years, maybe just when he was four, but it was still the sweetest thing ever. And when he hugged, it was different than when the girls did it. His hugs were softer, cuddlier. He melted into me. I wanted to eat him up.

And then it started, a few years ago…the change.

At first it was just the no-more-hand-holding in public. Okay, fine, he doesn’t want to be a sissy, I could live with that. I kept my own hands stuffed carefully inside my pockets, lest I forget the rule.

Then it was the transition into the one-word conversation.

Me: “How was your day?”
Him: “Fine.”
Me: “What’d you do?”
Him: “Nothin’.”
Me: “Really? Nothing?”
And, usually, I could coax him back into the world of multi-word dialogue.

But lately, it’s other things, too. Man things.

I honestly believed that this most recent affliction was restricted only to my husband, but as I’ve asked around, it seems that it’s more of a male species sort of thing.


So how can you spot the warning signs of Male Pattern Blindness? Well, the answer is simple, conversations between you and the male in question will go a little something like this:

Potentially infected male: “Have you seen my [insert any item here: remote control/car keys/Coca Cola]?”

You: “Where have you looked?”

Him: “Everywhere.” (Note the one-word response)

You: “Did you look in the [insert most obvious location here: couch/pockets/fridge]?”

Him: “Uh-huh.” (This is very nearly a grunt)

You: *sigh* “Fine. Let me look.” You check and find said item in the *exact* location you just discussed. Sitting in plain sight. Or in the case of the remote, possibly wedged slightly between two cushions, which as you can imagine *would* be somewhat confusing.

Ladies, I’m begging you, this is serious! This is neither a joke nor a drill. We need to act quickly before our sons and brothers are poisoned by whatever is ailing or husbands and fathers.

I’m worried that I might already be too late for my sweet little boy, that hormones have already clouded his vision so badly that he can no longer see that bright red can of Coke staring at him from the shelf on the fridge.

Let’s not let it happen to your sons too.

Thursday, December 15, 2011

It’s a Festivus Miracle! (And Giveaway!!!)

Well, there I go again, really “connecting” with my younger readers by making a Seinfeld reference. Do young adults even know what Festivus is? Come on, the airing of grievances, the feats of strength, the Festivus pole? Really, nothing???

Oh well, I do have some great news. Look what I got on Tuesday (and, no, not for Festivus)…

Yes, you saw right, it’s my very first, shiny new ARC of THE LAST ECHO!!!

And because it’s the season for warm and fuzzy...and you know, giving...I’m thinking that means: GIVEAWAY!!!!

So here’s the deal: I’m going to give away not one, not two, but THREE of these brand-spanking new (and slightly petted), hot-off-the-presses ARCs just in time for the holidays. You can keep it, gift it, or swap it. It’s totally up to you. But first, you have to win it!

Here’s how...

From now until noon Pacific Time on Sunday, December 18th, you can earn points by:

2 points – Being or becoming a follower of the blog (this one, right here!)
2 points – For adding The Last Echo to your Goodreads "to-read" shelf
2 points – For being or becoming a follower on Goodreads (different from adding the book, mind you)
2 points – For being or becoming a Twitter follower (c’mon, all the cool kids are doing it!!!)
1 point – For Tweeting/Re-tweeting the contest (there’s a 1-point max here, so don’t send me your 20 points for tweeting ;)
1 point for telling me (in the comments) your favorite Body Finder moment (from any of the books...Enthralled included)
1 point for telling me (in the comments also) what you want for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanza/Festivus!

If you play your cards right, that’s a total of 11 (pretty darn easy!) points you can earn, folks! But remember, I need you to tally those points in your comment* for me and leave your email address so I know how to reach you if/when you win!!!

*I know this cross-posts all over the place, but leave your comment on the original Blogger post at www.kimberlyderting.blogspot.com (not on Goodreads, not on LiveJournal, not on Tumblr...you get the idea!)

Oh, and yes, international entries welcome!

Winners will be chosen using random.org on Sunday, December 18th!

And for those of you who don’t know what Festivus is, check this out:

(Psst...here's the link in case you can't see the video!)


I emailed the winners yesterday but forgot to post them. So for those of you who were curious, here they are (and, yes, I did choose FIVE because I was feeling the holiday spirit!):

Ashley @ Book Labyrinth
Nikki A
Jennifer K
Sara (Twitter name: @Olive_Pearl)

Congrats, you guys! And I promise to have another giveaway. SOON!!!

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

How To Buy A Book (Or: How Much Do I Love Lara Zielin Right Now???)

So the awesomely funny and talented Lara Zielin is at it again. Not only was she the creator of The Bluggie, but last week she posted this fantabulous graphic aid for those in need of book-buying skills (and, trust me, in this confusing marketplace, it was much appreciated!).

Check it out:

You can read more on her post by clicking...here!

You're welcome!!!

Monday, December 12, 2011

Awesome(!!!) Book Trailer...

Check out this reader-made video for The Body Finder...

Isn't that awesome?!? I sorta, kinda, totally love it!!!

Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Hey, did I mention...(Event News!)

That I'll be in Portland, Oregon on Monday, January 16th at 7PM? No???

Well, I will be!

You can come hang with me at the Powell's Cedar Hills Crossing store, where I'll be reading, answering questions, and signing with author Janet Lee Carey.

I know...it's a Monday night and you have homework/Monday Night Football/cats to feed, but come on, I really wanna see you guys! So make up some lame excuse to your teacher, set your DVR, and put out a dish of Friskies. How often do we get the chance to chat? Am I right???

See you there!!!


Okay, that title is my little play on words to let you know that The Pledge is NOW AVAILABLE on audio!!! You can listen to a sample here. Or you can get it on Audible.com, Amazon, or iTunes. (And maybe some other places too, but those are the ones I know about.)

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Join the YA Scavenger Hunt...

So if you've made it this far, I probably don't need to tell you how cool the YA Scavenger Hunt is, right??? But in case you don't already know, this is a fabulous sneak peek into what’s coming up in YA literature that runs from Dec 1 - Dec 4th.

Each author on the hunt is hosting another author’s bonus material (mine is out there on someone else's blog!) AND a link to the next step of the hunt. Take a couple of hours and work your way through the entire circuit collecting the words in red and entering all of the different contests you will find along the way.

For this stop on the Scavenger Hunt, I’m hosting author Jessica Shirvington, author of the upcoming EMBRACE.

About Jessica:

How many of us can say we fell in love at seventeen? A lot of us. But how many of us stayed in love? Jessica Shirvington has been lucky enough to meet and marry the man she fell in love with at seventeen. Born and raised in Sydney, Australia, Jessica is married to former Olympic sprinter, five-time National 100m champion, and current sports personality with Australia’s Foxtel and Sky News, Matthew Shirvington.

Married for almost eleven years with two beautiful daughters, Sienna and Winter, Jessica believes her early age romance and its longevity has definitely contributed to how she tackles relationships in her YA novels.

At age nineteen, Jessica opened and managed her first restaurant in Sydney, and then, while she and Matt were living in London, founded a fine food import and distribution company, Stella Imports, in 2003.
Moving back to Australia and searching for a creative outlet after the birth of her second child, Jessica started on her path to writing. Although a long-time lover of creative writing and poetry, Jessica had never considered the possibility of making writing her career. But with some time away from work, she finally had an opportunity to explore her potential. The result is her debut novel, EMBRACE, which marks the start of Violet Eden’s story.

Jessica says: “Writing EMBRACE was an amazing journey for me. Discovering Violet and the other characters in the book has been my delight. The first draft just came together so quickly. I remember starting one day and then, six weeks later I was looking at something that had the makings of a book (I hoped). It took plenty of re-drafts but that, along with the copious amounts of research, the editing, proofing, all of it, has been such an awesome experience.”

When asked why she chose to write young adult fiction, Jessica says: “I never considered writing anything other than YA. The reason is simple — they’re the books I choose to and love to read myself. YA books have the amazing opportunity to be there for a character’s ultimate turning point — to be there for the moments that will shape their adult future. That makes them really special.”


Violet Eden is dreading her seventeenth birthday dinner. After all, it’s hard to get too excited about the day that marks the anniversary of your mother’s death. The one bright spot is that Lincoln will be there. Sexy, mature and aloof, he is Violet’s idea of perfection. But why does he seem so reluctant to be anything more than a friend?

After he gives her the world’s most incredible kiss – and then abandons her on her front doorstep – Violet is determined to get some answers. But nothing could have prepared her for Lincoln’s explanation: he is Grigori – part angel and part human – and Violet is his eternal partner.

Without warning, Violet’s world is turned upside down. She never believed in God, let alone angels. But there’s no denying the strange changes in her body ... and her feelings for Lincoln. Suddenly, she can’t stand to be around him. Luckily, Phoenix, an exiled angel, has come into her life. He’s intense and enigmatic, but at least he never lied to her.

As Violet gets caught up in an ancient battle between dark and light, she must choose her path. The wrong choice could cost not only her life, but her eternity...

EMBRACE is now (or soon to be) available in the U.S., UK, Australia, New Zealand, Germany, Brazil and Turkey.

To find out more about EMBRACE, check out the book's website. And to pre-order your copy of EMBRACE, click here or here!

Jessica's offering you a peek at a deleted scene from EMBRACE over on the EMBRACE Facebook page (where you can also enter an exclusive giveaway)!

YA Scavenger Hunt CONTEST

As an extra bonus we’ve put together a puzzle with one keyword found on each website. Complete it and you will be eligible for a fantastic GRAND PRIZE which will include signed editions of books, signed bookmarks, jewelry, and many more exclusive gifts with at least one gift from EVERY AUTHOR!

Directions: Search for the 37 keywords—one on each Scavenger Hunt website—that are highlighted in RED. When you are finished, go here to the puzzle form, where you will find a list of scrambled keywords. Put your keywords in the same order as the scrambled ones—from #1 to #37—and paste that list into the entry form.

Rules: To be eligible for the grand prize, you must submit the completed puzzle form before noon on Dec 4th Pacific Time. All the keywords must be included and you must include your full name and address. Entries sent in without name and address will not be considered! The contest is international.

Ready to go to the next website on the Scavenger Hunt?

Click HERE!