Friday, August 27, 2010

Some Girl Love!

Last weekend we went to a going-away party for our oldest daughter’s best friend. She’s married now, with twin girls of her own, and her husband is in the army so they’re moving to Texas where he’s being stationed. It was sad to say goodbye, but I was proud of my daughter, proud that she listened to me all those years when I’d told her: Boys will come and go, but hang on to your girlfriends.

It got me to thinking about the kind of advice I give my kids (and more importantly, to my girls). I want them to feel good about who they are and confident about what they can do. I want my girls to take the world by storm!

That's right! I'm that mom. I want to give them real advice, useful advice so they can go out there and kick ass. Not mamby-pamby advice about How to Please Your Man or Ten Tip to Make Your Lipstick Last.

But one of the lessons I think all girls should know is how much we need each other.

And I’m not talking about people needing other people. I’m talking about women needing other women. I’m talking girlfriends.

This is important, especially during those teen years, when it’s easy to get lost in the world of boys and crushes and first loves. Butterflies are the very best aphrodisiac. And the quest to find that “perfect” someone can make a girl turn her back on her friends. But it shouldn’t. It’s a mistake that too many girls make.

You’ll need those friends.

So before you forsake them, breathe. Take a moment to think about it.

Your girlfriends, if they’re really friends worth keeping, might actually be there for life. These might be the bonds you forge that last through college, marriages, childbirth, divorces (yours, hers…or both), sickness, and loss. Hers might be the shoulders you lean on when you need them the most. She might be the only one willing to hold your hair when you puke.

Don’t turn your back on her to pursue a boy, you can have both. Be smart about it. Find the time to make her feel important too.

Because, trust me, when he’s gone, she’ll still be there.

4 comments:

josh healy said...
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Robin Reul said...

What a fantastic article, Kim. You're so right, and you tap into something so important here to incorporate into writing for that age group. Thanks for posting this!

Tam said...

Oh I loved this! So true, every word.

Jess said...

Fantastic post! I had friends in high school who disappeared whenever they had a boyfriend, and it was so annoying. By contrast, my best college friends & I have been together for 12 years now--longer than I've known my husband. I'm so proud of those friendships!